Today is a new day...I will renew my  strength in God.  The end of the day yesterday ended well despite my melancholy... Drue and I went to a movie and saw Star Trek.  I really liked it and the line at the end spoke to me.  Spoken by Kirk, "I would rather die helping others live,  than livie and take a life  kill others.  Something along those lines.  Enjoyable.   Drue and I the went for a walk and we discussed life and God and family while laying in the grass in the park. What a special moment that I will have as a great memory forever!  It was special!   Today, we are going to try a new church.  I need one that is a little more intimate and develop some  friendships with common denominator.  Namely, God and a spiritual basis. 

I wrote a poem to her trying to describe some of what  I am feeling. There are at time I fell inspired.

Often you know the day will start out hard and you don't know how you will feel

Not knowing what kind emotional card life will deal

It's different because i know it can confuse

Words and poems to sort out things I often use

At times through some days

I ask God why did it have to be this way

I pray And plead that I and this  be part of his plan and will and ask for plainly what he has to say

Because it hurts that we each  went our separate way

I know we have said we both  have to move on

And each listen to that song that "his will be done "

That doesn't make it feel any better

And that's why I write this form of a letter

We are each travelling a different path with that often feels alone and long

Though I know we both turn to God through prayer and song

I could write so much of what I learned and loved

But Only God through His grace and not what I earned

I pray often for you and your kids and those around you

Hoping you find solace and refuge in our God and I know you and me both do

Today is Sunday and we go to worship with others and associate in our own way

May it especially be blessed and we know him more each  day

These writings I feel are inspired from deep within

Knowing it makes you think what do I do with this and what do I say to him

I just write because it helps me sort out a thing or two

Though it doesn't change anything or what to do

Family, life and Always much to do

One good thing is I have spent so much time with Drue

Though I only write now  I want you to know

Through Gods grace did we get to know each other and grow

As hard as it seems for you and for me

I do count the memories as some of the best that could be

The depth and kindness we often showed

It can be done we both now know

I have no idea where my path leads

I just know to continue my spiritual journey and lean on him in need

It's is difficult to write these things and send them off to you

But there is  no anger or hurt directed at you.

I will close with a prayer indeed

Because it is something we both need

Lord, I ask you bless and lead us closer to you

That we love and follow  you in all we do

We both love our kids and pray they follow you too

May we be examples like we should

Open your plan to me and .....

Because I know I am confused and it doesn't seem fair

We know you are God And their are things we don't know and see

Just guide  us so we can be on the right path as plainly as we can see

Life with you God is   a journey of love and faith

May we each be wrapped in the love of your spirit each day.

In the name of Jesus I pray

And we grow more deeply each day.